This smells like the terrible twos.

 Let's be honest, there are certain aromas that evoke certain emotions in your soul.  Ginger bread candles take me to Christmas time. 

I can smell  Love Spell by Victorias Secret and it takes me back to being fifteen when it was my favorite. 

I can turn around in the store when I smell someone wearing Tobi's Cologne. 

And then, there's A&D ointment. 

 When I smell that putrid smell, I want to cut off my nose.  

I refuse to use it because I can smell it through the diaper and pants.

I'd rather smell 1000 dirty diapers, or six hundred pairs of stinky sweaty socks than A&D for three seconds. 

Ok, I'm being dramatic. 

Any way, you get my point.  

Lets rewind a few days, and I'll inform you how psychotic my oldest child has been. He's been a nightmare and is on a sleeping strike. (Currently he's still yelling he wants to get out of bed) A few days ago at  nap time Tobi went in to tell Riah to go to sleep for the fifteenth time.  When he went in, he found that our darling son had opened a drawer,  removed a bottle of lotion and squirted it all over his floor, dresser and walls. 

Fast forward to bedtime that night. I go in to tell him to go to sleep for the fifteenth time. There is an entire box of qtips (hidden in his top drawer for months) emptied on the carpet and bed. With the tips chewed off. 

Fast forward to last night. 10:50 pm.

A loud "MOOOOMMMMMMM" rang out from his bedroom.  

 In a panic, I jumped up from my bed and went to his room. 

And the smell hit me. 

A&D. For. Days.

Part of me wanted to turn around and never go back in his room. But eventually my maternal instinct kicked in and I flipped the light switch to check it out.

And there, in his bed, was this child.

His hair spiked up. His face all a glow. His bed all a stained. Smeared with the horrendous smelling A&D that was evidently in a drawer. 

There were globs on his blankets. Globs on a pair of socks in the floor. And an empty tube twisted up in the midst of it all. 

And it smelled horrible.

Anyone want to take him off my hands?   Preferably before bedtime.

Dear fellow mamas, I don't mean to brag, but..

 Sunday morning  Uriah  had a hard time in  his class at church, so finally they came and got me out of  service to see if I could calm him down.  When I got to him, I scooped him up and almost immediately he stopped crying and told me he wanted down and started playing. I stayed in the room a few more minutes to make sure he was going to be ok before sneaking back out.  This gave me a few minutes with the two ladies that were in there  and one of them paid me the highest compliment I've gotten in a long time. 

She began to tell me  that she was impressed with my mothering abilities and  that her experience was different than mine. She said she had watched me before and that I handled myself well and always had the boys and myself looking presentable. If I'm not mistaken the word "supermom" was thrown around.

 I really wanted to laugh in her face.

Instead, I chose to just say thank you and move along back to service. But it was really nice to hear. Especially to me, living in a whirlwind, always feeling like I could be doing better. 

This morning, both of my sick boys were crying and my patience was on it's last leg. I had had enough and left them both to get up and floss my teeth. That's right folks, to   floss my teeth.

As I looked in the mirror at my greasy hair, and red nose, while listening to both boys fuss I thought "I bet that lady would think I'm supermom now".

 Today has been messy. Snotty, fit-throwing, crying, coughing, I-need-ice-cream-now messy. 

But you know what? I've come to the conclusion that I am indeed supermom. 

 Because I'm doing my best.

Even on days like today, when my best isn't as good as yesterday.

And when my best doesn't seem as good as the other moms on my Facebook feed. 

I'm still a good mom. 

Even on days when I don't get the boys out of their pjs until after lunch. 

Atleast I fed them.

Even on days when I'm so spent that I make them nap early.

Atleast I realized I needed a break before I snapped.

Even on days when I am so short tempered I feel like all I've done is yell.

Good Lord willing, I will get another chance. 

Even when my child seizes the opportunity to give his stuffed ninja turtle a bath in the sink while I gather the next load of laundry.

 Atleast he is comfortable enough his home to have an imagination and PLAY.

Even on days like today, when instead of folding  clothes, I'm on the couch, drinking Mountain Dew, watching NCIS, and painting my toenails.

I deserve a break.

I'm doing my best. I am supermom. 

And so are you. 

In The Eye of The Beholder

 Life is moving really fast  lately.   It's been two and a half insane, hectic, wonderful months  since we met our new boy. And Uriah is in love with him. Tonight, for a moment, I got to cuddle  them both for a few minutes. Suddenly time slowed down, and I  began to study my sweet boys little faces. I was just enthralled with how perfect they were in that moment and in a moment of what I can only describe as motherhood bliss I said  to Uriah, "You are the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." 

Sweet, right?

I couldn't leave it alone. I then asked, "What's the most beautiful thing you've ever seen?"

With a big grin, Uriah said "turtle power." 

Ninja turtles. 

The most beautiful thing  my child has ever seen is Ninja. Turtles. 

How sweet.

Happy birthday, baby!

In case you haven't noticed..I rarely Never blog anymore. I'm a little busy keeping Uriah alive and growing a new baby. But today I need to gush a little and I wasn't sure how much Facebook would allow. :)

Today,  this baby

Who turned into this baby last year,

Is now this baby.

And I don't even know what to do with myself.  

In less than two weeks we will introduce him to a new baby. His new baby. A baby that will cause him much grief when he gets mama's attention or steals his toys or wants to be included when Uriah has friends over. I can't imagine loving another one. Calm down, I know you just died a little and want to tell me I will and how it will be fine.. I'm aware. I know I'll understand when he gets here, but right now, all I know is the  psychotic sweet baby boy still jabbering in his bed because he's too hyped up on donuts to take a nap. 

So for now, I will soak in each moment for the next  thirteen  days. Especially this one. Today, I celebrate the reason I'm always exhausted. The reason my house is always a wreck. The reason I know every cartoon character known to man. The reason I spend most of our disposable income in the toddler boy section. The reason I laugh most of the day. The reason can't stop staring at the amazing father my husband has become when he's playing ball or wrestling or just snuggling on the couch. Today I celebrate the reason I cry at commercials. I understand life a little bit better because of the boy who's first word in the morning is "mama!!" From his bed. He is my most precious gift that I am so thankful God gave me. Even when he's throwing a fit and making my face hot because I want to beat him in Red Lobster. 

 Happy birthday precious boy, I pray each one is even better than the last. And even though life is about to change, you will always be our first love. You are the one who taught us how much we could love a tiny human, and unless Ezra beats your record of sleeping through the night at two weeks, you'll always be my favorite. Don't tell him I said that.

Whoever said the first year of marriage was the hardest is a liar.

Today marks three years since I said "I do" to my best friend in the whole world. 

As soon as I got the ring on my finger people started giving us advice and I heard repeatedly that the first year was the hardest and that if we could make it through that the rest would be wonderful. 

Ha.

I'm convinced those people are on crack. You see, the first year of marriage Tobi and I actually liked each other..like, all the time. Everything was still new, we hadn't lived together long enough to really truly get on each other's nerves yet. We made it through the first year fine. And although we've never been in danger of divorce, it gets harder and harder to remain in that wedded bliss. Tobias Vest knows better than anyone on the planet what to do if he wants to see me turn green and grow six feet before my head spins completely around..and vice versa. And it gets harder and harder to laugh at his corny jokes..and it gets harder and harder for him to come home to my shoes in the floor. 

No one ever told us how hard marriage is. It's a constant, daily commitment to get up and love Tobi more than I love myself. To try to consider Tobi's feelings more than my desire to snap at him for not doing things the way I would do them. 

Most days I'm realllllllly reallllly bad at that. 

That's why I am forever thankful that I am married to a man who understands the grace of God and because God has extended his grace to him, he can extend that grace to me. Because my husband loves Jesus, he loves me unconditionally. Because his parents raised him the same way my parents raised me. With an example of unconditional love. I'm so thankful that his parents as well as mine still love their spouse with a forever love..and that their marriages are centered around the one perfect love that only the Lord can give. 

It gives me hope on the days where I'd like to set my husband on fire.

Thank you Tobias, for loving me when I am unlovable. For rubbing my feet when they stink. For changing half of all our kids poopy diapers. For always letting me try your food, and for sleeping on the edge of the bed because I like the middle. Thank you for spending the past three years living under the rule of the Christmas grinch and the apple juice nazi. You're better than anything I could have ever imagined for a

husband, even though you could invent something cool and make us millionaires and that would improve it a little. Happy anniversary, soul mate. 

Mama seeking future spouse for charming toddler.

Maybe its a southern mama thing, but I've been searching for Uriah a wife since I saw the "turtle" between his legs on the ultrasound picture. Who knows, maybe its just me wanting to control who my baby ends up with. I have plenty of girl baby prospects so I guess its a good thing baby Ezra is on his way.  

It was a lot easier to match him with someone before I found out what a weirdo my kid is. Each day new criteria is added..she needs to accept his weirdness but not be so weird herself that my grandchildren are hopeless. I mean look at Uriah's parents..we are so to blame. If he marries someone as weird as him no one will want to be around my grandbabies..or worse, they will be the sequal to Honey BooBoo. 

His future wife needs to love sports. 

And food.

And animals. 

And she needs to be able to handle him screaming "truck!" every time one drives past. 

And preferrably she will discourage him from any more peeing in the closet. 

Anyone know any girl babies up for the task? I have one who fits the description, matter of fact I think they are soul mates.. but her daddy is in law enforcement and ya'll, I'm just not sure Uriah can handle that. 

Come on, you know he's cute!

Banana baby, you're wearin me out!

Most new mommies know about all the pregnant apps you can get on your phone to keep track of your baby's growth..the one I have compares baby ezra to a food each week.

 Today, I am 20 weeks pregnant and apparently wee little baby Ezra is the size of a banana.

Let's be real for a minute. I birth giants so he's probably one of those freak bananas that are occasionally in the bunch you grab at the grocery store and think Holy cow, that's a huge banana. Anyway, I can't seem to keep any sort of energy up lately and I don't remember it being this bad with Uriah. How can something the size of a banana be so exhausting? I was pondering this this morning as Uriah was screaming for yet another balloon in Old Navy..and I realized maybe the difference is that lovely beast of a child I spend all day chasing.So I decided to see exactly how exhausting he is.

After our errands this morning we got to my parents so I could clean..within minutes Uriah was chasing the neighbors dog yelling "Hey rebel! Hey girl!" She's a little afraid of him because he's never still. Once.he caught her for a kiss he ran off to the backyard to yell "bike!!!" repeatedly.

Once he realized I wasnt going to push his 35lb body around on a bike he moved on to the four wheeler.

About 2 minutes later we were fonally inside and he was apparently getting read for lunch while I was putting our milk in Nana's fridge. Can't turn your back for a second.

I took the hint..

while I was still cleaning up his lunchable mess I hear footsteps at the other end of the table. 

Maybe THIS is the banana baby.wearin me out!

From then on it's been a series of tactics to get his diaper off, ripping up a newspaper in the floor, and trying desperately to chop off my legs and feet with a toy shot gun. I think its safeto say chasing this cute dude around and cleaning up his newest mess is what's wearing me out..and folks, I'm not sure I'll survive one more week to see the reprocussions of carrot week.

I was also a beast of a child and payback is an ugly, ugly thing.

In memory of an angel face I never met

Today, my heart is breaking for a family I've never met. A family I stumbled across by accident on Facebook. This day is nothing short of painful for them as it's their precious daughter's third birthday. Ann Reese Grote died Christmas Eve, just 18 days before her baby sister entered this world. And my heart aches. 

I have lost a sweet baby in my belly..and it was hard.  Really hard. But I never held it in my arms. I never soothed it as it cried. I never knew a part of me with its own personality. But Davey and Amy Grote did. They knew their sweet girl and loved her. She was taken suddenly by what was nothing short of a freak accident, and my heart aches for them. It's really  strange to me how believers come together for people they don't know, a common bond I guess. I have been praying for this family as they simultaneously grieve their loss and welcome a new baby at the same time. 

Reading about this family has left me with a twinge of pain, and guilt. I have a boy who is healthy and living and who is so often taken for granted. He's loved to the max all the time but sometimes it is hard not to lose my mind when he's running in my kitchen opening then slamming shut every drawer he can get to before I spank his rear. 

So today, in honor of beautiful Ann Reese, I chose and still choose to revel in my child. I choose to laugh with him as he runs and laughs and fake screams like he's afraid of the vacuum. I choose to be patient when he wants me to fix the straw he just pulled out of his capri sun for the fifteenth time. I choose to study his face while he builds blocks. I choose to cheer him on as he shoots basketballs and wrestlers and blocks and a sippy cup through the hoop. And now I choose to go love on him extra now that he's waking from his nap. 

I'll spank him tomorrow. 

Revel in your kids today, you never know when all you'll have are memories of stepping on legos in the floor. 

And pray for the family eating pancakes today remembering the only two birthdays they got to spend with their girl.